I Love My Golden Ox.

I said goodbye to 2008, just 29 no, 30 days ago. I thought I didn't need resolutions anymore, thinking they're all too much crap, knowing resolutions aren't just for new year's day, but all days through the year; and I guess I was right not having had any resolutions made. I went very general, I had hopes. That were mild hopes. I was preparing for reinforcement of my hopes, at the right time. I did that on Chinese New Year's Day. The year of the Golden Ox.

I bought stuffs for the Lunar New Year. I went shopping, I decorated my home, I bought cakes, I bought tidbits, and I ended up eating almost all of them. Like I'm surprised. Heh.

I took some shots here; it's not easy to get such beautifully decorated stage for festive seasons back at the shopping malls here.

Then, I welcomed the Golden Ox Year hours after my family's reunion dinner. It was a mixture of peace, serenity, harmony, simplicity, 'amor' and acceptance. I felt it that way, and I liked it. When the clock struck midnight, the dark night was awaken by the explosions of burning crackers. I almost wished I could light up some bombs. Well, I must admit the little mischief still lingers, despite the years of growth, internally and externally.

So no, there were no bombs for me.

The Niu Year was greeted . . .

. . . and well wished.

I went back to kitchen, made some jellies, till approximately 3 a.m and there was supposed to be a family gathering at 10 a.m. Made the jellies, for fun and came up with 2 flavours. As usual, I am most inspirational to come up with things, after midnight. The jellies? There were nice. As a matter of fact, I still have a tray of fruit punch flavoured jelly in the fridge. Would you like some?

We met, wished and we ate. We had the moment we wanted.

And then I cooked a pot of Mee Suah in the afternoon, thinking I could serve any visitors. But it was sucked up to the end of the pot, and gone by the next morning. I had brandy in it. I guess, my 'niu' skill (cooking) isn't so bad afterall. Would you like some Mee Suah? ;)
Mmmm. So 5 days into the 2009 Lunar New Year and I guess celebration hasn't slowed down till the 15th night? I still have some beers and cakes and cookies and tidbits, even Gummi bears and marshmellows from Famous Amos in the containers. I guess I'm just going to eat all these up on my own. If you happen to be my friend and are around somewhere here, well, I won't fire a bomb at your pants. I'll be around till Sunday evening.
I have a 'niu' life going, on Monday. And I bet you do too.

My Sayang NiuNiu will be around till I get back. If you question what she (I guess she's better off as female) does, then it's time to ask yourself, may be you have the answers. May be you need to get yourself a new pet. Not a 'niu', may be something else. Why not try a bloody iguana. It's cold blooded.

P.s --> Oh, my golden Ox, NiuNiu says she's cool about stuffs and accepts everyone (as they are). So should me, and you? Till then, please keep an eye on my little NiuNiu. She can't be left idle. Trust me. On this.

Enter The Procrastinator

I have tummy discomfort. I am looking at my messy room. So dusty. So haywire. So impossibly clean, and yet I feel strongly, to do something about it. But I can't, something is holding me back. I pick up some clothes and pile them up together according to their own 'kind', but that is it. Now, there are piles of clothes everywhere. The new cupboard to keep my clothes is still empty. I want to give it a wipe before laying my nicely folded clothes in it. But I can't, something is holding me back. I try again. I look at my dusty fan. So much dust. I can no longer feel the strong air it gushes when it starts spinning at me. Only faint air. My room smells so me. So clamped. I can hardly think in this atmosphere. I want to fix it, clean it. I look around. I don't know where to start. Arggh, my room! The place where I retire at the end of the day. Waiting to be cleaned. And I'm waiting for it to happen. May be tomorrow. Since tomorrow never dies... There'll be one day when it'll be cleaned. I am arranging the books now. I put them aside. I go through them, thinking to myself now, I need to get rid of some of them. Sweet Valley High? No, I am not supposed to read these anymore. I'm too old for Sweet Valley. SPM and STPM books? What if I were to teach someday? I might need these books as reference... Arrgh, the complications, where should all these go? Let's just leave it alone, today. May be tomorrow I'll know better for sure where they all belong. I creep to my bed, now sheetless. I want to buy new bedsheet, something that suits the color of everything, my curtain, my wall, me. But not today. I lay my head on my pillow. I close my eyes. I fall asleep. Eyes closed, I see the books, the pile of clothes, the dust hovering around me, I could feel my contact lenses sticking to my right forefinger; accept that it's no longer soft and moist, but hardened. I fall deeper into my sleep. I can't tell now, where am I? Am I still in my room? When I wake up, will I still meet the pile of books, clothes and dust in my room? I continue sleeping, like there's no tomorrow...

Promising myself, it'll be better when my eyes open next.

Around The Corner?

It's pretty strange, as every time I blog, Bye Bye by Mariah Carey is always running on my WinAmp. I do not know why I am so attuned to this piece. An inspirational number? I guess.

This is my maiden post for this new year, 2009. Yeah. Just sharing some thoughts I have for today (just 42 minutes into it).

I'd firstly like to tell you about my random thoughts on forwarded SMSes. I find it very amusing, if not, lame to receive SMSes during Christmas Day itself that goes something like this,

()"""() ,*
( 'o' ) ,***
=(,,)=("')<-*** (""),,,("") "** Christmas is just around the corner,
I'd like to wish you a Blessed and Joyful Celebration..
Etc, Etc....

Note the phrase highlighted in Red. It bewilders me to know how insensitive or ignorant some people can be. Not sincere in words nor in action. How would one not realise what are the contents of the SMS they are about to forward to others? Sending someone a SMS that tells you Christmas is AROUND THE CORNER on Christmas Day itself?? Mmm.... Wow. It just simply meant either three of the following:

1. I'm thinking of you on this special day and I want you to remember me by wishing you. But then again, I am not going to admit that i actually mean what I say. So, I try sarcasm.


2. I don't think I like you enough to wish you. But I guess someone else must be wishing you too. So, I don't want to be left out. Cos I can't bear to live alone, isolated.


3. I don't really know how to read. I just saw and understood the word, 'Christmas' on the SMS.


OK, by now I bet some may find me too demanding. "Complaining about well-wishers who actually bothered to even wish her??" I am grateful for having well-wished, but if it comes, please bother to do so, properly. Sincerely.

Thanks, anyway. *rolls eyes*

It's so simple, yet made so difficult. People rather go through the miles of forwarding lengthy messages just to send a 'sort-of message' to someone, yet not wanting it to actually 'reach' you. When all that really matters is a simple 2-phrase (OK, or more) wish, that comes from the heart. OK, I do love the length, but please, keep it right!

For this New Year, my resolutions are to be what I am expecting from myself.

As for the whole,

I ask not much. Just to be surrounded by good nature, fun, love, productivity, efficiency and of course, sincerity.

My apologies for the sudden change of mood. I need to rush to the loo. Well, at least I mean it. ;)


Happy New Year! @};->-----

and Bye Bye by Ms.Chong now.

~* Lovely Christmas *~

OoOHH, Christmas updayted! Had a Christmas Eve family collaboration dinner with 7th Aunt and family. We had Western food. The usual Christmas Turkey and roasted Lamb Leg is a must. Due to objection from 7th Aunt, am not allowed to publish the pictures of the dishes we had that night - She's always thinking what she (perfectionist) is serving isn't good enough; which fortunately is untrue -- mm, a trait I must somehow inherited from her too. We had a lovely dinner, and oh, red wine also.

But 7th Aunt didn't stop me from posting up her lovely Christmas tree -- Well, she doesn't know.

Right after dinner that night, we went to Blessed Sacrament Church for Christmas mass. Started at 12:00 am and ended almost at 2:00 am. I supposed the long hours wasn't caused by the long sermon but by many carols being sung. And I didn't bring my camera to church. :)

On Christmas Day, I had a few guests, though did not invite anyone other than a few friends as I would not consider what we had was an 'open house'. By evening, we had dinner at Youngest Uncle's residence where I bumped into a couple of schoolmates - pretty surprising, at a relative's house! I wanted to take picture for the night but I forgot to bring my camera... Sigh.

On the 2nd Day of Christmas a.k.a Boxing Day... We had another family dinner at my cousin's house to celebrate an aunt's 76th Birthday. Was a great dinner indeed, too. So many dishes, so little space in the tummy. Aaahh... And all the calories. But does it really matter? Even without the weight - I'd still look the same. Was really great to see all from overseas who came back, just to reunite with the family on the special occasions. Keeps me reminiscing of the years that flew past before my eyes as I see my nieces and nephews growing up and getting older. It made me realise how I have made it through the years, in one piece, thanks to family, God and trusted ones.

The beautiful Christmas tree that had my gift beneath it, at my cousin's house.

Reminds me of the "May The Light Shine Upon You" phrase.

Mixed - Vegetables. Hmm. I love veggies!

Fried Chicken Wings... I had them for free!

Chicken Satays... Lovely.

Potatoes!

Turkey! (I think)

Woo... You don't mess with Ze... *slurps* Hehe..


This is the Malaysian beans.. I love Chai Tow!


Noodle of Longevity


Spaghetties

With all these food and Drinks....

*GgRrrr*


Stout... PAIL.


Juices

A lovely Birthday Cake....

Cake courtesy of Alda's Cakes... My cousin baked this! Yes HE did!

AND a JoyFuL bunch...


Although it came and it went,




....... Do I have a reason to not feel Blessed ?

Feliz Navidad*~

Two words: Feliz Navidad. That is a Spanish phrase meaning 'Merry Christmas' or literally "Happy Nativity". Yup, those are the definitions I got from Wikipedia. Hee, Hee.

With just about a week to Christmas Day, and 'Merry Christmas' the phrase to utter to all fellow Christians I'm meeting, I asked myself, I looked around and -- ask myself again, what makes Christmas, Christmas?

One thing I have realised, many are celebrating Christmas without knowing what actually Christmas is all about. Some are celebrating because it's just another festive day, to some it's the time of showing some love by exchanging gifts or have some roasted turkey or lamb leg for dinner. To another it could just be insignificant. What is Christmas really?

Christmas is the celebration of the birth of Jesus Christ in Bethlehem centuries ago. Christ, the Son Of God was born on 25th December. Hence 25th December=Christmas Day=Birth of Jesus Christ! And yes, it is a celebration. A celebration of the coming of child Jesus The Saviour.

How am I celebrating MY Christmas Day this year? I humbly started by setting up a Christmas tree (just last night, honestly). My Christmas tree came a long way. It's almost as old as I am, I think. Decorating the Christmas tree is already an understood task of mine every year. So here I am, showing off to the world (for the first maiden time!) how I have decorated my Christmas tree this year!


This is how it looked like when I just started.... Few big silver BALLS which I bought last year I think... and I bought MORE silver BALLS this year... But tinier ones. You'll see them in the final result of my tree! (Note: Ignore the messy background, house-cleaning is still in progress!)



So this year, I decided to make it a "White Christmas" since I seem to have so many white decorations, and as always, I love white, so white it is this year as oppose to my golden tree last year.
In order to create the snowing effect... Here goes the nicely-shaped Polystyrene I got from either my aunt or uncle few years back.... TaaaDAAAAAA >>> Snow! ;)



After few hours of drilling, yes tree drilling... to get the best out of my white stuffs; YES, white decors I meant -- This is how my tree looks like after being decorated and sitting pretty at its intended location (Yes, it's night time by the time I'm done with it.):

Please do take note of my lovely Reindeer at the top...

I shall end this post with a lovely verse from one of my favourite Christmas carols...

"Its all a dream and illusion now
It must come true, sometime soon somehow
All across the land dawns a brand new morn
This comes to pass when a child is born..."


Here's wishing you from the bottom of my heart, have a Blessed Christmas!

With Love.

Reminiscing My Life in KK

More than 3 months have passed since my last return to Kota Kinabalu. I graduated on the 24th August 2008 to be exact.

After living a few years in KK ever since I started my first year in the pursuit of my degree, I could not help but wonder what I have gathered when I return to my hometown; and I still am, wondering.

Was I happy? Did i learn a lot? I made new friends? I had new foes *smiles* ?

.... Truth is, I don't know. I didn't even feel much when I was there. It was just like a dream. I was there. Time flies, and I'm back.

Yes, time flies. Every single semester just passed, like that. Yet, every semester was a different tale. Every semester I left my hometown feeling weighed down. I dreaded the times to go back and stay at the uni's off-campus hostel. So much of the 'dislikes' that I felt, I managed. Over the years, I had learned the art of 'numbing' the feeling in situations that were not likely to be pleasant.

Okay, it was not bad afterall. People would think of Kota Kinabalu as a very 'ulu' (backward) city as they would of any other cities in East Malaysia a.k.a Borneo. Truth is, it's not so bad afterall. Okay, I sound so lame describing, but forgive me, I'm still unable to feel. I'm trying now. and trying.

First year passed in no time, I survived. I had two West Malaysian roommates in my first year. Strange as it was, the three of us managed one whole bloody year cramming in one helluva small room. It's really crammed, even with one double-decker bed. I had the single bed. Our so-called 'hostel' was located about 15 minutes off-campus by bus. I am kinda proud thinking back, that I actually was pretty happy with that and did not intend to apply into campus although facilities were much much better, but heyy, minus the freedom. :) So Okay, I survived my degree staying at this 'hostel' which is actually a normal residential area turned 'hostel'. That was legendary Taman Indah Permai, a 'black' area known for its crime cases. We undergraduates were living in double-storey terrace houses, in which one house could accommodate 7 weird girls.

I shall sum up first year as a very blurry year, I wasn't almost sure what the hell I was doing back then. There lots to digest and time was speeding. But in two words, pretty OK. Oh. before that, I felt like I wanted to whack a lady working in MAS dealing with Grads card. (but then again, I was pretty good at 'numbing' my feelings, so I left it at that.) She seemed to have problems. That was in first year. After that, Air Asia came to the rescue. Pheww. I didn't see the 'lady' anymore. Good.

Ahh. I sense this is getting complicated. I need a break.

To be continued....

When You Should Be S-I-N-G-L-E

Of late, I've been hearing so many people around me, especially ladies, and yeah guys too... with relationship problems.... I guess what, know? I think most problems were already there, right from the start! Yes, the beginning of a relationship actually tells the challenges that are to come your way. So, before diving into any relationships, it would be wise to go through the raw data I've accumulated from 23 years of being human (with feelings).

When one hooks up with another, it must and should be of pure mutual interest and attraction. But indeed it is difficult to distinguish the right feeling from lust or loneliness. Though I'm not a pro or would consider myself experience in this field, I'd highlight the TOP 10 Reasons you should stay single according to the following stated below:

***Note: The following facts have no connections with those who are dead or yet to die.

Do your part, save lives.

TOP 10 REASONS YOU'RE NOT READY FOR A RELATIONSHIP:

1. You are still checking out other guys/girls when you're out in social surroundings (while with your significant other / potential partner present).
   
2. You are seriously not interested to know what has been going on in his/her life (one way street).
   
3. You begin to find out what the definitions of love and like are through the online dictionary or by asking your peers (in which they begin to get really sick of).
4. You are not even turned on when he/she tries to act coy, cute or seductive; instead you turn your head around and grimaced (and actually feel sorry for doing so, later on).
5. Going out on dates have become a burden; you actually have to plan what you are expected to do, to so-call 'make it happen'.
6. You are going out with him/her and don't expect him/her to help you carry your heavy luggage (if he's a guy) or proof-read your written articles (if she's a lady -- DUH!) because you would rather ask someone else to do it for you, so as not to send the WRONG signal. (You are afraid that this would lead to some kind of 'intimacy'!)
   
7. You wonder why you don't feel for him when everyone else is head over heels in love with him/her -- instead you go, "What's wrong with me? Why I don't see that like you guys do?"
8. The only reason you're with him is because he is loaded with $$$$$$ / The only reason you're with her is because she's hot and you can't wait to take her >>> to bed.
9. When you meet his/her parents, you just can't look them in the eyes, for obvious reasons -- You think you're about to screw up their child's life!
10. LAST but not Least.... YOU SHOULD BE SINGLE when you know you will eventually have to utter these to your partner, "It's Not You, It's Me...."

p.s --- Nobody wants to be a filler. Hence, may be more people can reduce the damage. Damage to the heart. Ouchh.

Let's make this a global awareness! And no, I am not writing this AS IF I've just survived a bitter relationship. Just... this is an awareness I think most should instill inside.

A BROKEN HEART KILLS PRODUCTIVITY!